“You say you love me,
but I know what you mean.
You’re thinking of me,
but who knows who you’re really thinking of.”
Chained by our own expectations, we fill in the unknown gaps of other’s identities with colors we favor. We paint the images of who we want to see and become lost in the infatuation of our masterpieces. Our self-revolving desires blur the blemishes of another to protect our egos, for we believe the perfect partner completes us. In this way, we set ourselves up for our own trap of inevitable disappointment, because we are out of touch with ourselves while we “fall in love.” During that process, we lose awareness of our emotions, needs, and truths, to find ourselves dreaming instead. Dreaming into what can sometimes twist into a nightmare, if we’re not careful.
“You say you need me,
but I’ve got a lot to learn.
Maybe you’ll teach me,
but I’ve run out of cheeks to turn.”
In this realization of the challenges we place on ourselves, we discover what we need to learn and change. For me, I’ve uncovered a need for radical self-love. A mindset in which I do not sacrifice myself to appease others. In which I am not critical of myself, fueled by insecurities oftentimes influenced by other people. Placing expectations of another person on them, without their truth or consent considered. It is each our mistake to turn to our idealized partner to teach and heal us from our self-inflicted wounds, but it is shameful to ask someone what only you can give. One of the biggest lies one can believe is that another person is the key to peace, happiness, and redemption. The love and healing each and every one of us long for are already within our spirits and sense of selves.
Turn – Ten Fé